Soliloquy of the First Presidential Debate
by Steve Grammatico
[As the Republican nominee begins his opening statement, President Obama reflects.*]
I
Ooooh . . . he speaks, the right’s Orion!
Expel your foul dis-charges—phew!
Could glares steal breath, Paulie Ryan,
‘Bout now you’d be turning blue!
Huh? Big spending cuts are needed?
Ah, Fed tax rates mustn’t rise.
And these . . . “facts” I’ve not conceded?
Why? They’re falsehoods, damn your eyes!
In the past we’ve had discussions–
“Paul–thanks for coming!”—I must bear
Rants on Market repercussions,
Treas’ry futures, budget snares.
Our job outlook’s pathetic; rarely
Has it been this bad, I think.
Want a deal to face this squarely?







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